22 Things All Payton Students Know to Be True


  1. Stairs are a full body cardio workout
    Four years of going up and down the stairs at Payton has not made it any easier. The most fit marathon runner in the world would probably be breathing heavily after trotting up our three flights with a full book bag.


2. There is no worse moment than when your Nspire is dead and you don’t have a charger

You have a math test next period, and none of your friends can lend you theirs. This is the moment when you realize how useful your Nspire is, and how much you actually need it. So you either borrow an old one from the math department, or go without one!

3. You can have a frosty blizzard in one class but roast in another

It’s fairly warm outside, but you know English class will be freezing. And if it’s snowing outside, don’t bother bundling up, because chances are your history class will be a sweaty, sticky inferno. Either Payton’s thermostat is toying with our temperature, or someone behind it is.

4. You gotta love the “I just signed up for this because it’s the only thing available” enrichment

How do all the enrichments get full so fast? You’re not in P.O.P, or Basketball, or math team, so the only option is to crash astronomy tutoring, even though you are not in astronomy.

5. Nothing is harder than explaining what enrichments are

No one outside of Payton understands what an enrichment period is. It’s not a class. It’s just an extra 45 minutes of school at the end of the day, right? We’re not really sure how to explain it, but we know we are ready to go home.

6. Small lockers are just an illusion

Beware the abyss of sweaty gym shoes, unused notebooks, and several random articles of clothing belonging to your friends. How did you fit all this stuff in here anyways?


7. We’ve all had to fight over computers in the library at lunch

When you know you need to print that 25 page article, you know you need to be the first person in the library at lunch. Every procrastinator is headed there to finish assignments and print out homework just like you.

8. You are forever enrolled in all classes ever on Moodle

Although Survey Literature was the first class you ever enrolled in, it will always be the on your Moodle homepage. There’s no way to unenroll, so you’ll have to deal with it all four years. By senior year, you’ll have to scroll through a bunch of accumulated classes just to find the ones you’re actually in.

9. The blissful day before seminar days are for getting stuff done

“Yea, I’m totally going to get stuff done today. I’m going to do all my homework, study, and do that thing I was supposed to do a month ago. Then, maybe I will actually have some free time!” said the Payton student sitting at Chipotle with their friends. Spoiler alert: the student did not get anything done that day.

10. Pull out toilet paper will never make sense

Similar to a box of facial tissue, our bathrooms are equipped with pull out dispensers. It was a sudden and abrupt change that made us think about how much paper we actually use when we use the bathroom, and how much we really need.

11. Paper towels will never be found in our bathrooms

Also, there are only two hand dryers. If the bathroom is full, I guess you’ll have to “Shake It Off”!

12. As long as you put your stuff down, you’re not late

Even though we have seven minutes to get from class to class in our small school, it’s not enough time to make a pitstop at your locker or the bathroom. “But Mr. Chau , I was here on time. My stuff is on the chair to prove it.”

13. Promposals are a thing

Loud music and a crowd forming around the atrium can only mean one thing… it’s promposal season. Freshmen don’t even know it yet, but promposals are the seniors’ way of making a big deal out of asking someone to prom, and a competition to see who can put on the biggest show.

14. Seniors are really good for getting your off-campus lunch

It’s great to have senior friends. They know their way around the school, they can give advice on what to do/not do at Payton, and they’re especially helpful when you need that Starbucks fix before your next class.

15. 87% of Payton students own a Macbook

Ok, we haven’t officially done a survey, but we can guess just from looking around a class that most students do use a Macbook.


16. We have metal detectors that seldom get used

Homecoming and volleyball games are the only time these large, intimidating machines get their time to shine. Imagine how long the line to scan your ID would be if they were actually in use every day.

17. You have to ask yourself: Is that a new student, or an exchange student?

An unfamiliar face in class can mean either one of two things: it’s someone you’ve never noticed goes to your school, or he/she is an exchange student.

18. The struggle of explaining the block schedule to people from other schools 

Each class is roughly an hour and a half except for split classes you have every day. Blue days are first period, then split block, then third and fourth period. But it all depends on your lunch. And orange days you start with fifth period, and… you know what it’s complicated.

19. Not being sure which team is Whitney Young’s and which is Payton’s

Two competing schools are sporting orange and blue as their school colors. Payton’s are orange and blue, because, you know, the Chicago Bears. What’s their reason?

20. You have to dodge runners speeding through the hallways

No track? No problem! Dodging students is not usually a part of running, but at Payton it is. So, kids, beware when track season comes around because the hallways serve as practice ground for track & field sprinters (fun fact: 11 times around the atrium is a mile).

21. You forget that all your classes are honors

This is actually something you forget when going to Payton, and comes in handy when you start applying for colleges. There’s a sense of success putting honors in front of all your classes on an application. If you didn’t go to Payton, you probably would feel special about having an honors curriculum. Too bad gym isn’t honors credit.

22. You have a pretty sweet view in a lot of your classes

Yep, that’s the Sears, ahem, Willis Tower looking back at you while you sit through math. And over there is the John Hancock. It’s hard to not get distracted with an upclose view of Chicago’s famous skyline. It’s even cooler when it’s dark out.


Photo courtesey of Michael Salisbary

Categories: Features

Tagged as: ,

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s